Change – Fear of the unknown?
“Each of us guards a gate of change that can be only opened from the inside.” – 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. Covey
Change is inevitable, there’s changes which happen out of circumstances, crises or choice and the latter is the one that I will be focusing on.
Everyone has elements of their life they would strive to change but how many of us are actually making the steps towards this change? Changes by choice can vary from anything in your life, few being health, career, family life, priorities or relationships. There’s probably about 9 out of 10 of us that complain on a daily basis but don’t do a great deal to make a change to better themselves. Speaking from experience, I used to be one of those people with the constant mindset that change is difficult with a huge fear of the unknown.
Being someone that is fearless when it comes to anything adrenaline fueled, you would think changes wouldn’t phase me in the slightest. Wrong!
My personal experience: I had to make an extremely tough decision after graduating from university (which seems like decades ago now) landing a graduate job over 4000 miles away from where I have always called home. Excitement initially kicks in but soon after my mind went into overdrive.
What if I fail?
What if this wasn’t meant for me?
What if I regret my decision and have to pick up from where I left off or even worse start from scratch?
How will I cope with all the rules and regulations of the Middle East?
What if I don’t get on with my colleagues?
How will I manage my finances?
What if I hate my job?
Cultural problems I may encounter?
How can I leave home/family/friends?
(The list goes on but you get where I’m going with this I hope!)
My thoughts to the above worries now nearly 5 years on – So what! I honestly believe you can start from scratch at any point in your life you just need to be willing to let go of what makes you unhappy, change your mentality, focus and move in the right direction. Moving country where I knew absolutely no one in my “first real job” made me into the stronger person I am today and open to change as uncomfortable as it was at times. Believe me, it wasn’t plain sailing I did encounter many issues with money struggles initially, it took me time to find my real friends, understand what I needed from my career and I never ever got old of being home sick but it was the best decision I have ever made for my own personal growth as well as career.
If you’re unhappy in your life the only way it’s going to get better is if you change your head space, perceptions and change the way you think about life and the choices you make – you have to be willing to be uncomfortable to progress in life. My change was drastic in comparison to some you face in “normal” daily routine life and here are 8 key steps I use to deal with change in a positive way.
- Realisation – First element of change is realizing you need to change and if you’re reading this you’re probably half way there!
- Take small steps – Rather than attempting to multitask, start by changing step by step which will help you have more focus and majority of the time you won’t give up.
- Exercise – Personally when I exercise it relieves stress and also gives me time to think alone. As well as health benefits exercise helps with mental well-being.
- Stop overthinking, just do it. Don’t miss out on opportunities with the fear of failing, even if you fail once or 100 times you will eventually succeed and learn from your mistakes.
- Positivity – Having a positive outlook on life and the change your encountering will help you cancel out all the negative thoughts that are eating you up inside.
- Knowledge – Keep on learning and gaining more knowledge as with more knowledge comes more confidence. Learning helps us to be more adaptable and flexible to new situations therefore more comfortable of the unknown.
- Future – Change for your future, your ambitions, your goals in life. Don’t over think the past – It’s happened and all you can do is learn from it and move on from it
- Gratitude – Lastly be grateful for what you do have in life. Most of us reading this are fortunate enough to have access to the internet and a roof over our heads so before you overthink changing aspects of your life as it may go terribly wrong be grateful for what you do have and will most likely to continue to have even if the change you try to implement doesn’t work out for you initially.
This is my first time writing a blog about general life issues but if this has changed at least one individuals mind set to make a positive change in their life, I have succeeded and it was worth it. 🙂